Caught Between a Rock and a Sad Place

by Gatherer

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credits

released 18 June 2013
Recorded/Produced by Adam Cichocki at Timber Studios
Mixed by Mike Watts at Vudu Studios
Mastered by Steve Haigler at Vudu Studios
Artwork by Mike Maroney

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Track Name: And Now Everyone Sings The Blues
Fuck the lies you told
you're the best in your mother's eyes.
I hope it takes you every breath just to stay alive
so you don't talk anymore.
You wish you had it rough day to day?
Your father's check served on a silver plate.
You're writing songs that your idols sing.
I don't owe you that
and if I ever get what I deserve,
no amount of gold will replace what I've endured.
(I'm not tooting my horn)
It's so sad to see the one you love when all you're doing is struggling.
I've been told times like these build you up
and break you into who you want to be.
Am I chasing myself or safety?
It's about remembering who you are,
or who you want to be;
staying true to you.
You Fuck, I sing the blues too.

Now we all sing the blues.
Fuck you, I sing the blues too.
Track Name: I Have Seen Mountains
How does it feel now that I'm back at home?
Who created the distance within these roads?
It's so fucked to not remember what it feels like
to be touched or missed.
And now I reminisce on days that we spent
living in a pool of our sweat.
When you're stuck being lonely,
it takes an awful lot to get through this.
I won't pretend that this is for everyone.
I wonder, who are we to pull you apart again?
When you're back with the one you love
instead of living on the phone.
What happened to "you'll always be my friend"?
How does it feel now?
Were you afraid to leave the one you love?
Was it the dreams that you gave up for this?
It should never be brought to this.
But we engineer our lives.
Would you change this at all?
This is the loneliest that you've felt in life
but we haven't gone yet.
And when you get back,
how will we find the means to start again?
It's burned into me, a 12 hour drive.
It was you and I on top of Colorado.
Singing songs that meant so much;
wish I had those days back now that I'm home.
Track Name: 108
There's no certainty to why anything happens to you.
What reason did we all end up here?
I'm not afraid anymore,
what happens when you see.
I'm not trying to leave.
They're all dead.
I can still feel it.
I can still feel you,
when you're here/when you're not.
All I want is to be gone;
I know you're there waiting for me.
If there's any good left in this world,
I swear I will save you.
I never thought you'd wait.
I promise there is good, I swear I will save you.
I never thought I'd see you so close to me.
I could never be like the great men I want to be.
I can't even clean the mess I made,
I'm not a great man.

They're all dead.
I can still feel it.
Track Name: What If I Can't
Where's hope when half the time
you are dying to give up and give in to real life?
All the maps indicate it's time to go home.
Or do we rally on until the end
ignoring what our fathers said.
We'll never grow old just like them.
Do I stick to my dreams; the one I set for myself?
Though they're so far apart.

Must have been something somebody said.
I'm sorry that I am not sure.
Kills me to think that this all could just end without closure.
An entire book finished without its final chapters.

Then there are times like tonight;
swinging in a basement with my best friends for
50 kids who give a shit about the songs I wrote
about not growing up and never giving in.
Those summer songs,
dog days we spent living miles apart from the ones that we love.
Let this fade into memory;
wash up ashore on the sands of my sleep.
Track Name: Brittle Bones
I'll stop blaming myself when all my actions equal up to my heart,
and I can find the room to breathe.
At least I have a sense of self, and I'm not afraid of change.
I've seen the strangest places and they're crying out my name.
I have a sense of self, so there's no one else to blame.
I've seen the kindest faces and remember all their names.
I've felt just how you feel, close if not the same.
If you're lucky to have a lover, let your walls dissipate.
I have a sense of self, and I'm not afraid of pain.
These ambitions on my shoulders will put me in my grave
when I'm spent.
Track Name: Ocean Floor
I've been doubting everything that I love lately.
Pulsing through my veins like the salt in the sea.
Neither promises nor broken dreams
are repaired during sleep or sex or somewhere in between.
With you I slow dance underneath the sea.
What if I fail you?
Can't live up to expectations that you want me to?
Not that I could, I don't doubt you wouldn't stay.
My voice isn't strong enough to keep the wolves away.
So when push comes to shove, you will crush all my bones.
I can't shake this feeling when I'm sleeping all alone.
This world will never be good enough for me.
There's no company or clarity,
to ease my mind like the soft of your skin.
All the worshiping, songs of praise,
never led me to an answer.
One that seems to matter.
I haven't been sleeping much/
lying awake.
Dreaming of days to come,
seen miles away from here.

What if I fail you?
Can't live up to expectations that you want me to?
Not that I could, I don't doubt you wouldn't stay.
My voice isn't strong enough to keep the wolves away.
Track Name: Segovia
Forgive me for never coming around.
I've been so caught up with those ups and downs.
I'm so tired, my eyes won't shut.
But a heart that's gold don't mean a thing,
awake or sleeping.
I'm constantly reminded days are fleeting.
Whether I bleed or am breathing,
the limits life set remain defeating.
Do we make the most of our time spent together,
so at the end we don't regret what we've done with our short time?
I don't want to be the shadow of a person I am.
I don't want to say.
You hear me?
Am I making a sound?
I've been so caught up with those ups and downs.
I'm so tired but I can't sleep.
Cause a heart that's gold don't mean a thing,
awake or sleeping.
Track Name: Campfires
I had dream last night,
the kind that kills your appetite.
I dreamt all the friends I had had died.
So don't take long when it comes now.
Not everybody's gone and your sympathy for me is running dry.
And you swore to christ you found god,
in the love we made before you lie dead on your lawn.

This is where I'm supposed to be with you.

So when you get back,
I'll be home.
We can have our love.
It's like feeding a dog his bone,
so he never leaves his home for the rest of his days.
Track Name: Death Bed
There's a point I've got to find,
where my heart and my soul can keep up with my mind.
All that I feel drains out of me,
everything is tangible but still so out of reach.
Do you regret the time you've spent looking for words to save?
All the days I've spent with you,
you know I need them more than anything.
I know the day will start and sun will set with or without you here.
No. That is not an excuse I want to hear.
Old, and in my arms you'll always be.
I'm a bed for your bones;
chariot for your broken dreams.
No, you're more than life should offer me.
I am trapped in myself,
prisoner to what this world brings for me.
Old; in my arms you'll always be.
I'm a bed for your bones;
chariot for your broken dreams.
When you're on your death bed, who will be there?
All the words you sang to me linger through eternity.
When you're on your death bed, who will be there?
All the words you say.
All the words about fate that may come and sweep you away.

When you're on your death bed, who will be there?
All the words you sang to me linger through eternity.
When you're on your death bed, who will be there?
Track Name: He Went Down There To Die
Are you there?
Are you listening?
I hope one day you will meet me halfway.
When you're here, those thoughts become real.
Will you always come and go?
The last couple of weeks I drank till I was blind.
There's a whole lot of catching up you left behind.
Don't expect for this to be alright.
I did a whole lot of growing up, you were taking your time.
You said we'd grow old, I could rest in your bones.
I need you more than ever when I feel this alone.
Hopelessly devoted to something you don't know.
Forever chasing warmth in the lines on the road.
When do we call this an end?
When will my actions make amends with my friends?
When do we get to start again?
Even second chances are given to the dead.
I want to be there through it all;
live out the days that will remind me of the oldest days.
When everything that you love just isn't enough;
won't keep you warm anymore.
Where do you run?
It's always too much or never enough.
Settling seems to be the hardest part of growing up.

Hopefully you end the troubles I create for myself.
And we will never start again,
I'll be loved and be glad.